Reality Check

So do you have your ticket for the big Super 7 draw? If I win, I’ll share it with you, okay?

Odds of getting all seven numbers: 1 in 22,000,000.

The Odds of:

  • Dying in a car crash: 1 in 5,000
  • Freezing to death: 1 in 3,000,000    (Unless you live in Winnipeg - then your chances are much
    worse)
  • Dying from flesh-eating bacteria: 1 in 1,000,000
  • Dying from falling out of bed: 1 in 2,000,000
  • Dying in a plane crash: 1 in 250,000
  • Being dealt a royal flush: 1 in 649,739
  • Dying from Asteroid impact: 1 in 20,000
  • Unending spin-offs from Friends on TV for the next two years: 1 in 1
  • Emeril saying “Bam!” at any given time on his show: 1 in 4
  • Jakob Nielsen making some silly prediction about the future of the Internet based on his “own experience”: 1 in 3
  • Donnie Osmond appearing in a celebrity version of a popular reality TV show: 1 in 9
  • That guy sitting beside you on the bus being nuts: 1 in 19
  • A movie version of your favorite book sucking hard: 1 in 7
  • Spilling something bright and obvious on that brand new white shirt of yours: 1 in 3

I realize that this could be really funny (and in the hands of someone like Davezilla, it probably would) but I’m feeling pretty mellow and unfunny today… you got any good ones?


ISSN 1499-7894
Recent Posts
SEARCH
Contact Archives Web Love Writing Photos FAQs Home