The BeatnikPad Money Back Guarantee
I, Neil Lee, being of righteous bluster and tangetial majesty, solemnly do swear that:i) There will be no posts herein which mention the words “journalism”, “blogging”, and “the future of online writing” (or such babbleclop) in the context of the Web. That is, except for this one.
ii) There will be no speaking of myself in the third person, or utilizing the royal “we”. At least, not very much.
iii) There will be no posts whatsoever which tells you, in no uncertain terms, “what abba member am I?”, or “what Rat Pack member am I?” or “what disposable razor am I?”, or even “what boreal lichen or mold am I?”. I know that no one cares: not even me.
iv) If I ever post my “Blogger code”, may I be whipped repeatedly with a large portrait of Jimmy Walker while wearing a rather gothic-looking pair of lederhosen. I mean, that’s only one step away from telling everyone what my dexterity, strength, hit points, and charisma scores are. And that’s frightening.
v) Posts about Star Trek (Next Generation or otherwise) are strictly prohibited. End of story. (Posts making fun of William Shatner are allowed, though.)
vi) I reserve the right to post images of my cats or any other animal I choose, as long as I balance it with an image elsewhere of something that kicks ass.
vii) Coming soon: more crankiness! More perturbed punditry! More riboflavin! Same great taste.
Your satisfaction guaranteed, or your money back. Every penny. On that you have my word.
